Sometimes I warn people I talk to that I’m a Christian and see things from that perspective. It is sad that has become a way to detox a conversation before it starts. It is my perspective and doesn’t have to be theirs. I am not a dictator. I tend to disagree with the primary way I’ve personally experienced one-on-one evangelism.

I remember walking down the street in Lincolnton, North Carolina and running into a man who was handing out Bible tracts. He asked me if I was saved. I said I was. He offered a tract. I said I didn’t need it. He quizzed me about how I was saved. I said the usual way. He asked me to come to his church. I said I was happy in the church I attended, and he continued to push me to attend his church. He said a lot in that dialogue, most of which I didn’t like.

He started with a saved question that requires a stranger to understand religious concepts and terminology, which is unfair. Jesus spoke to us in our language without requiring us to understand His background and church vision. The witness didn’t believe me when I said I was saved and didn’t believe my church was adequate. He did not respect or accept anything beyond his understanding and experience. He felt the need to be in control.

Being in control is not the same as loving someone. Being in control means a person has to be able to determine and judge the outcome to measure success. Loving takes no control of the outcome. It cares for the person as they are and respects their choice and perspective, even when disagreeing.

Jesus had a complete revelation of the beauty of God and communicated that beauty in the language with examples completely appropriate to the listener. English teachers say the same. Know your audience. Communicate in language they can understand. Be respectful of your audience. We make communication about us when it is really about the relationship we have with others. Caring should show throughout the communication process.

The truth is that we, as Christians, can be as immature and thoughtless as anyone else, even when we are doing our best in our faith. It is easy to forget that witnessing is about the beauty and wonder of God, not about our religion and personal process of growth. We are children of growth in His kingdom, not finished products to take charge of others. We are caretakers, not controllers. We are sent to love on those He already loves and share His beauty with those for whom He cares.